As a follow up from my previous article on the Malay Wedding Cultural Procedures, you’re probably wondering about:

• How much does a typical Malay wedding cost?
• How many rings are involved? Do I have to buy them all?
• What are the costs involved in each stage?
• Can we skip a few procedures to save costs?

Words on the streets are that the average Malay wedding cost is circa RM 50,000 in Klang Valley. Seems a little steep. Is this true? Is this budget not enough? Or is this budget way over the top?

To find out, I interviewed 5 of my friends who are already married (not longer than eight years ago). These 5 friends of mine are as average as a Malaysian can be.

I consolidated my findings of the average Malay Wedding costs in this handy article.

Let’s dive straight into my survey’s summary:

Summary of Malay Wedding Costs from My Survey

My findings from test sampling five wedding costs will show a realistic range of Malay wedding expenditures from the families on a tight budget to the ones who want to splurge:

From my test sample for the all-in Malay wedding cost;

• The median (middle) value for the Malay wedding cost is RM 50,830. If you’re an average Malaysian, this is the number that you’ll be benchmarking.
• The lowest wedding cost was RM 32,100, held back in 2018.
• The highest wedding cost was RM 113,300, held back in 2015.
• That’s a whopping RM 81,200 difference between the cheapest and highest from my test sample.
• Friend 1, 2, 3 & 4 portrays a relatable Malay wedding expenditure for most Malaysians, and Friend 5 went a little all-out to portray wedding costs on the higher end of the spectrum.

• The largest expenditure is the wedding ceremony itself (Sanding) with a median cost of RM 33,000, which is (61%) of the overall wedding budget.
• The Akad Nikah is the second-highest wedding cost with a median value of RM 18,600. This takes 34% of the overall wedding budget.
• Both the Merisik & Tunang stages’ costs are minuscule in comparison to the overall budget at a percentage of less than 4% each.

Rings: How Many Does the Guy Need to Buy?

There typically will be 3 rings (cincin) in total, but not all are compulsory. For the confused fellas out there Googling this very topic, here are some visualizations of what each ring (typically) look like:

Which ring is the most expensive out of the three? From my survey, there are 2 scenarios:

Ring Name	English Definition	Scenario 1	Scenario 2
Cincing Merisik (aka cincin belah rotan)	Survey ring	Cheapest, simple gold ring	Cheapest, simple gold ring
Cincin Tunang	Engagement ring	Most Expensive out of the 3: big solitaire diamond ring	Mid-Range: Either a smaller diamond ring or another gold ring
Cincin Nikah	Wedding ring	Mid-Range: Wedding band ring	Top of the Range: diamond ring

The chart below is the spread of the 3 cincin costs from each of my test sample:

From my test sample, everyone skipped 1 ring, either the Merisik ring, or the Tunang ring, or even the Nikah ring.

Friend 5 went a little all-out on their Nikah ring.

If you’re shopping for rings and would like to know a price as a rough benchmark, the median (middle) value among my survey sample for the 3 rings are:

Rings Takeaway:

• The above values are findings from my survey; it is a mere guide. You can, of course, spend more or less in any of the rings that you choose with your partner.
• Fellas, don’t feel pressured to spend so much on rings. Have a budget and communicate with your partner on each side’s expectations and work out a fair solution.
• I advise the bride and groom to communicate and have a budget before you go into the jewelry shop. Some salespeople will use guilt to try to make you spend more than your budget.
• Friend 5 skipped their Engagement ring and reallocated the budget for that into their Nikah Ring.

Merisik: The Cost

All of my test subjects skip the Merisik procedure, but most (4 out of 5) of them still get the bride a Merisik ring.

The median (middle) value of the rings from my sample is RM 800.

Meminang (Tunang): The Cost Breakdwon

Tunang Costs	Friend 1 (2018)	Friend 2 (2018)	Friend 3 (2013)	Friend 4 (2013)	Friend 5 (2015)
Cincin Tunang Cost	RM 800	RM 0	RM 0	RM 1,500	RM 0
Hantaran Tunang	RM 1,000	RM 0	RM 2,500	RM 300	RM 0
Total Tunang Cost	RM 1,800	RM 0	RM 3,500	RM 1,800	RM 0

Tunang (Engagement) Cost TakeAway:

• The median (middle) value for the Tunang process is RM 1,800.
• For those of them who decide to practice the Dulang Hantaran, says that the gifts are usually inexpensive sweets.
• Friend 1 said that most of his Dulang Hantaran gifts are stuff that they can use for their wedding ceremony later; like kain (fabric) Sanding.
• Friend 2 & 5 skipped the Tunang (Engagement) process altogether because their logic is that they knew that they’re getting married, so this ‘booking’ process seemed unnecessary.

Akad Nikah: The Cost Breakdown

Akad Nikah Costs	Friend 1 (2018)	Friend 2 (2018)	Friend 3 (2013)	Friend 4 (2013)	Friend 5 (2015)
Nikah Attire	Absorbed in hantaran tunang	RM 930	RM 800	RM 600	RM 2,500
Cincin Nikah/ Wedding Band	RM 1,800	RM 2,500	–	–	RM 12,000
Mas Kahwin	RM 8,000	RM 5,000	RM 1,000	RM 3,000	RM 1,000
Wang Hantaran	Lumped in mas kahwin	Lumped in mas kahwin	RM 10,000	RM 10,000	RM 20,000
Dulang Hantaran Nikah value (1 side)	RM 5,650	RM 5,500	RM 9,000	RM 5,000	RM 12,000
Total Akad Nikah Cost	RM 16,450	RM 13,930	RM 20,800	RM 18,600	RM 47,500

Akad Nikah Key Findings:

• The median (middle) value for the Akad Nikah is RM 18,600.
• Friend 1 was smart. His Nikah attire was already part of the gift in the Dulang Hantaran Tunang in the previous step.
• Friend 1 & 2 have no Wang Hantaran because it is lumped together in their Mas Kahwin.
• Wang Hantaran is based on the bride’s request. It is totally negotiable. Stay classy though fellas throughout the negotiation process 😎
• The Dulang Hantaran gifts between the bride and groom are typically matched in total value on both sides.

The bride and groom are legally married at this stage! Woop! The next step is the Bersanding stage (wedding ceremony):.

Sanding (Ceremony): The Cost Breakdown

Sanding (Ceremony) Costs	Friend 1 (2018)	Friend 2 (2018)	Friend 3 (2013)	Friend 4 (2013)	Friend 5 (2015)
Location	Shah Alam	KL	Johor	Putrajaya	Shah Alam
Invited People	1,000 pax	1,000 pax	2,000 pax	600 pax	1,000 pax
Cloth for entire family	RM 0	RM 950	RM 1,500	RM 1,000	RM 1,000
Sanding (Wedding) clothes	RM 0 (reuse Nikah attire)	Package RM 3,500	RM 2,500	RM 500	RM 2,500
Invitation cards (kad jemputan)	RM 300	RM 600	RM 950	RM 500	–
Door gifts	RM 3,200	RM 7,600	RM 7,500	RM 1,500	RM 1,000
Bride’s make up	RM 0	Package	Package with catering	RM 400	RM 500
Photographer	RM 0	Package	RM 500	RM 2,000	RM 5,500
Event space (venue & decor)	RM 3,350	RM 3,350	RM 0	RM 6,500	RM 21,500
Food Catering	RM 8,000	RM 20,000	RM 20,000	RM 8,000	RM 28,000
Total	RM 14,850	RM 36,000	RM 32,975	RM 20,400	RM 65,000

Sanding (Ceremony) Key TakeAway:

• The average invitees are around 1,000 people. The fewer people you invite, the cheaper the wedding.
• The median (middle) Sanding cost is RM 32,975.
• The highest expense is usually the food catering with a median cost of RM 20,000.
• Event space rental and decor is the second and third-biggest expense.
• Friend 1 really knows how to save money by conducting his wedding at his grandma’s spacious kampung lawn for free and he was lucky that his aunts and uncles are all cooks at restaurants. Catering costs were only raw ingredients.

Where Cost Can be Cut Down

Tip 1: The Merisik & Tunang processes can be skipped if you really want to save money.

Tip 2: People who are planning to get married during this Covid-19 pandemic could potentially save money as you can’t have massive gatherings anyway. There will be huge potential savings in:

• Smaller venue, cheaper rental price.
• Lower catering budget
• Fewer invitation cards to send out
• Fewer door gifts to buy

Tip 3: For couples who are not so fussy, you can potentially save money by getting wedding packages (food + venue + decor + photographer).

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There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. This is my survey to get a rough idea of how much a typical Malay wedding costs. It is right on the money with what I expected:

Expectation Wedding Costs	Median Survey Wedding Costs
RM 50,000	RM 50,830

From my survey, the trend shows that the groom pays for the wang hantaran and dulang hantaran gifts, but the family will help out with the sanding ceremony costs.

Fellas, RM 50,830 is a lot of money. It’s better to start saving, like right now if you haven’t already.

Check out my Robo-Advisor article if you don’t know where to start when it comes to investing money.